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In my feels

Sorry whoever is reading in this. I'm in my feels lol. Someday I hope to get over the mountain top. Someday I pray I see what God has in store for me. Someday, I pray he just cracks me open and I just breakdown. I know he has a promise. I know he can make a way. My love for God is unmatched by anyone. I love God more than my friends, more than my fam and even more than any future love I should have. I don't know if that makes me the most isolated person in the world or if it means I'm like everyone else, but I have to believe God. I choose to believe in God. What do I want out of life? I want to experience love, experience happiness and joy and find my calling.... find what makes what I do fulfilling. I want to be the bridge for people, I want to share compassion, empathy and I don't know... just make some sort of difference. Is that too ambitious or isn't that what everyone wants? Maybe to pass down your life lessons from generation to generation... to be apart of the chain of life... I'm just spitting out my thoughts now.... Whatever it is.... patience is a must... discipline is a must.... time... seasons.... these things must pass...as we work our way towards our star... I've been on this journey for a long time now... and I think about others who have journeyed in the bible a long time too... my faith is being tested right now.... and I'm recognizing it. How long can I hold out??? As long as you need me to God.

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Isaiah Martinez

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